"Beer makes you feel the way you ought to feel without beer." -Henry Lawson

Wednesday, 16 May 2012

Clancy's Amber Ale

  Clancy's Amber Ale (5.0%)

Smells like a grey room, or a coldplay record... i.e As dull a dodgy STI riddled alleyway. Tastes like plastic or a chamber possibly used to hold Magneto from X-men. I see what its trying to do but good intentions are not enough. It's like what Aqua-man is to superheroes.... as Clancy's is to beer. This brewery needs to reevaluate their marketing. Joseph Clancy, master brewer? Bob Law thinks not. Bob Law says overselling tripe. Bring on the Tears, Joseph

Tear Beers

Saturday, 12 May 2012

Snake Dog IPA

Snake Dog IPA (7.1%)

Fruity as fuck and tastes like skittles in a glass... Smells like hop ninjas have taken over a hop factory! Tastes like what I'd imagine snoozeberries tastes like or like your 5 a day in 1 sip. It's a lingerer like a frolicking fantastisch flamer of an uncle who doesn't go home... However it is quite tasty but not as easy going down as a mitten selling hooker.

Rating: Reasonable Refreshment/Stamp of Approval

Brew Dog Tokyo*

Brew Dog Tokyo* (18.2%)

18.2 per cent..Holy Moly!! That water filter tap is so skinny... but back to the beer... Imperial stout! It's pretty strong, I guess. Bang of old-timey medicine from it. Reminiscent of Morgan Freeman with extra freckles. It's a ghetto booty, tooty fruity. Baby's stout got back! A sophisticated scrumptious slow sipper. Like an aging porn star, pondering on breaking the MILF market. Dangerous in the wrong hands. Let's all celebrate nihilism philosophies with a glass of Brew Dog Tokyo. Hats off to those cunning geniuses Martin and James!

Rating: One Scrumptious Solution

Great Divide Rumble IPA

Rumble IPA (7.1%)

Smells soapy. Soapy Ellis Bexter-esque. Not impressive but not too bad... Just a bit ropey. It may improve but don't want to hang around to find out. Tastes like an averagely written jingle but not "Jingle all the Way" It's not turbo time for this beer. It's forgettable like a handless handjob or a blowjob with too much teeth. It's not a mustard cutter and requires more high quality knife-age.

Rating: Reasonable Refreshment